"For me, it's the lashing out unjustly. Remind yourself to be curious about why your child is engaging in a particular behavior at a particular time. | When you tell a child, you didnt say something that you did say, it is a form of gaslighting. So now, you might tend to apologize for things out of your control. Turning the children against each other so you have to compete with your siblings for approval. A lot of parents think a child lives to make them proud, rather than to be happy. You mightve been made the scapegoat of your family blamed for anything that goes wrong. Yes, it seems harmless to anyone, but for me, even though I have everything, [depression is] still there and it wont go away just like that. Abusive parents act out of anger and the desire to assert control, not the motivation to lovingly teach the child. Even if no physical harm is actually done, this kind of fear tactic is emotionally abusive, and may be just as damaging as actual physical abuse. Instead of helping kids achieve their dreams, they fill them with self-doubt and create a lasting feeling of inferiority. They are self-absorbed. But that puts kids on the defensive, which makes them even less likely to listen, McCready said. It made me feel then and makes me feel worse now, so Ive stopped telling her things. Jen D. I dont think you have the skills for that career or Are you SURE? This is a broad statement that attempts to label your entire identity. Privacy A lot of parents mean well, even when they say the wrong thing, or when they ignore their childrens feelings. All trademarks and service marks are the property of their respective owners. Say something like, Ill help you just this once since were running so late, but lets work on this together later!. A former child abuse detective has warned parents against letting their children go to sleepovers, saying it is something she would never do after her experience as a police officer. Or maybe, in a desire to keep you healthy, your parent made excessive comments about your food intake and weight something they might even continue to do to this day. You can find even more stories on our Home page. Knowing the signs and symptoms Having emotionally distant parents is a common experience that can profoundly impact a child's emotional and psychol Theres a reason trauma therapy exists today. If children hear from parents that theyre a certain way, they might come to accept that as true even if it doesnt feel true to them. When confronted with something they said or did which caused a problem, this is often the response youll get. If you are struggling with the emotional impact of growing up with an abusive parent, youre not alone. Its a common phrase for anyone who wants to avoid taking responsibility for their own behavior or actions. This phrase is generally used by parents who are frustrated that their children arent measuring up to their standards or expectations. This often-over A developing child has to deal with some degree of pressure. You owe me. Being a parent is a full-time job, so it makes sense to expect your kids to help out around the house now and As adults, we can recreate these dynamics in other relationships., If youre demonstrating self-destructive behavior, it may be another sign that a parent was emotionally abusive. Cole says that once someone is able to understand what they experienced, they can become aware of how it impacts them as an adult. Or it can be ignoring their Emotional abuse has severe consequences for children, and studies show that these consequences could last a lifetime. While children are taught that words from bullies shouldnt hurt them, this doesnt apply when it comes to a parent. They will begin to question their self-worth, and they may believe they arent capable of doing well. For instance, they say that theyre in a bad mood because they have to take care of their kids instead of going to do something fun. Using religion to shame a child (as opposed to lovingly pointing them to spiritual values) can be damaging because in many religions, God is a father figure. Our passion is to serve and bring the best possible positive information, news, expertise and opinions to this page. Sometimes parents are doing their absolute best, and wounds still occur. Your words are just as important as your actions, and they affect your child equally. Web86K views 6 months ago Toxic parents can be extremely damaging to your mental health as a child but also as an adult. Your sister is so perfect, why cant you be more like her?, 38. The insults I am now used to started [then]. Sarah W. You can choose to be happy, you just dont want to. From my mom while I was trying to ask for help during a suicidal episode. Darian K. When my mother used to tell me every time I have depressive episodes: You should be thankful. 1. If you do not behave, no one will want you or love you. To this day, some 40 years later, I still believe I am unwanted and unloved especially if I do something wrong. Tammy Z. Another indicator of emotional abuse is if you had a parent who was physically present, but otherwise absent working on the computer, phone, or locked in a home office, talking to everyone but you, or lost in a drug- or alcohol-induced haze, Tessina says. It can also cause aggressive behavior and depression. WebWhen it comes to abuse, what comes to your mind? If it wasnt for the fact we look alike, you would not think we were related. Youre selfish.dd You never think about anyone but yourself., 16. They are never satisfied. When my mother used to tell me every time I have depressive episodes: You should be thankful. [1] 3 Understand physical abuse. Parents want their children to grow up and be independent, but sometimes they become threatened by their child leaving home and becoming their own person. #9: They were over-involved in your life. Labels hurt the parent-child relationship because they get in the way of parents seeing their children as struggling and needing help. It can be something as basic as not feeding or clothing a child. Saying this also gives the child the impression that you dont care about their feelings. How was I supposed to know? Marsha S. You always have to be difficult! anytime there was a difference in opinion. Marie V. Its just a phase. Mom talking about my panic attacks that Ive had since adoption and still have. Web20 'Harmless' Things Parents Say That Are Actually Emotionally Abusive 1. Notice and applaud effort, not outcomes. Even if the child/teen doesnt want to. They will start to see themselves as a difficult child, and their actions will show it. The parent uses it to try to convince their kid that something is wrong with them and will use it as a form of punishment. Get hand-picked resources and highlights from our Mighty community straight to your inbox. You should be grateful Im even talking to you after all the mistakes youve made., 12. If you find you often pick romantic partners that have traits like your parent(s), both good and bad, its something to be mindful of, Bruett says. And every child thinks the other has it better; that she loves the other child better. For more information see our. There is a thin line Curbing a childs ability to speak for him or herself when he/she is able can be abusive. Verbal abuse as discipline. Hearing I work all week and I come home to this? There are ways to stop the crying without shaming them for displaying emotion. Web15 Emotionally Abusive Phrases Parents Say (Without Realizing the Harm) 1. It will ruin their self-esteem and can cause self-hatred. You are forced to take responsibility for fixing yourself. neilnelly 1 day ago. I didnt realize until I was an adult that those were basic human rights. Tell your mum this. Tell your dad this. Your mum is this, your dad is that. The amount of times theyd mentally try and drill into our heads why each other was the worst parent was so damned detrimental to a child! Amber L. Expecting perfection from a childcan teach children they will only be loved if they perform well. If you are a toxic parent, it is also never too late to change your mind about the type of relationship that exists between the two of you. I know too many people, myself included, who have had zero to no privacy growing up. These little problems and the emotions that come with them are actually huge to our kids, said Amy McCready, a parenting educator, the founder of Positive Parenting Solutions and the author of If I Have to Tell You One More Time. When we discount their emotional responses to very real challenges, we tell them, How you feel doesnt matter, or Its silly to be afraid or disappointed.. I still cant shake that and Im 42 years old and have been in therapy for three and a half years. Does the trauma ever go away? When you make them feel like they arent good enough, theyll think they cant do it. This implies that not only isthe biological parent ashamed of you,but so is the ultimate father of the universe. I'm the Mental Health Editor here at The Mighty. Its like you dont want to be happy.. It appears you entered an invalid email. I [havent] been abused by my parents, but the thing I noticed when my school friend was being abused by her parent was that the mother would always made basic needs like food, clothes, roof over their heads into a privilege to be earned. I dont talk to her anymore. It can also cause an overwhelming amount of stress and anxiety for the child. Then they can work with a therapist to make changes in the way they interact with others. When a child hears something about themselves, they begin to believe it is true. My favorite song was hers. Followed by, You sure are filling out your bra Every weekend thereafter for the next three years. Kristy B. Necessary cookies are absolutely essential for the website to function properly. This phrase is all about putting children down, which is hurtful at any age. Once a child hears something along these lines, they will stop believing in themselves. Imagine if you were super close to being able to do your own zipper and just needed a few more tries, but then Dad swoops in and stops you in your tracks., Slow down and give your child the time they need to complete their task. Youre the reason I have grey hair., 45. Teaching your kids that everything must be perfect is detrimental to their minds. Terms. Web4 things toxic parents do that have a lifetime effect Neglect Neglect can take many forms. There, youll also find thoughts and questions by our community. Why cant you be more like your siblings?. They will become insecure about expressing their feelings and learn to bottle the emotions up, instead. You are not the daughter I wanted. My mom said this constantly. Abuse damages your self-esteem. This can be incredibly painful when a parent does this to a child, as a child trusts that a parent is going to love them unconditionally.. If you ask why they arent better at a sport, an instrument, or any other activity, theyll lose confidence. Saying, Back in my day, we had it so much worse then giving examples of how things were. This can include harsh, incessant teasing or putting a child down in front of an audience. That career is really difficult, my parents when I was younger and my inlaws. WebToxic parents inflict a lot of emotional and mental damage on their children, sometimes even knowingly. I didnt even know I was doing that until my first therapy session when I was 14. It also undermines their confidence. Bonus points if she can play the kids against their other parent so every person in the family is isolated from everyone else. Tracy S. Religion can be a beautiful thing for many families, but in some cases can be twisted and used as an instrument of shame and condemnation. They will go out of their way to emotionally manipulate you. I am beginning to believe it can but it takes a lot of time, therapy and reflection. Anytime I would bring up a new aspiration for a career, she immediately would find something to bring it down. By telling them that you think their opinions are silly, you are also trivializing the things that bother them. We parents are trying our best, but sometimes a lot of times we fall short. WebPhrases such as "you should know better" may be harmful for children in ways parents do not always fully grasp. Rejecting You are the sorriest youngin that ever lived.. We also use third-party cookies that help us analyze and understand how you use this website. For more from our#TraumaSurvivorscommunity, check out the following stories: If you or a loved one is affected by domestic violence or emotional abuse and need help, call The National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233, Hi, I'm Juliette. WebAskReddit People Share What Is The Most Toxic Thing A Parent Can Say To A Child?Leave a Like and Subscribe for more Daily r/AskReddit Stories! Untangling each of our parents' roles in our developmentreally seeing both their positive and negative influencesis the first step we take toward healing. It can be emotionally abusive to shame a child for experiencing unfavorable emotions, because emotions arent bad or good they just are. Violence is preceded by verbal abuse. The trust wound. It is their way of manipulating you into doing things they dont want to do themselves but still expect you to follow through on your end at some point down the road. Abusive parents train you to apologize for things that arent your fault. The biggest effect they have is to make the child feel that they deserve to be treated poorly. It is as detrimental to a child as physical abuse, but it impacts their mental health instead of their body. It can create problems in adulthood if a child mimics the parent and also plays the victim constantly, or if the child has learned they are always at fault and perpetually blames him or herself. This is true for activities, as mentioned above, but also for school subjects, household tasks, and anything else. To hear a toxic parent tell us that were stupid, or that we arent very bright alienates us from ourselves and forces us to start questioning our own self-worth. Elmquist says this may present itself in various ways in your current romantic relationship, including saying "I'm sorry" when you don't mean it, and feeling guilty for no reason. "Emotional abuse is abusing someone in ways that can be seen as traumatic. He endured five years there but eventually ran away and sought refuge with She would scold me about how Im not doing things her way and then proceed to tell me her life stories about how her life is tough. You cant see it the way you can a childs bruised cheek or hear their grumbly belly. This can be incredibly damaging to a child because they may not realize they were being abused, but still live with the emotional impact of neglect often struggling with their mental health and self-esteem as a result. Does the trauma ever go away? Emotional abuse is a way of sabotaging another persons feelings of self-worth and undermining their independence. The intent is to make you feel like a failure in all areas of your life. Kids often cry or melt down over stuff that seems really silly. When I started putting it in a savings account, she found out, forged my signature and took almost 400 dollars that was all that was in it. Amanda P. In an effort to see children realize their potential, some parents try to mold their children into who they think they should be. Both parents did that and, guess what, now they're in their eighties and I rarely see or call them. Intimidation. Here are some signs of an abusive parent we need to talk about: Parents who maliciously deprive their children of their basic needs or make their children feel guilty for receiving the things a parent is obligated to provide are abusive. If it werent for you, Id be happy., 47. Or maybe, When you hear this, its important not only to remind yourself that these words are untrue but also that you cant please your toxic parent no matter what you do. This is not only confusing, but also [takes away] the childs ability to know what healthy interpersonal relationships and boundaries are. Jodie A. These cookies ensure basic functionalities and security features of the website, anonymously. In childhood, Children have their patterns, but saying your kid always or never does something simply isnt true. They use physical pain to discipline and enforce abusive Talks to their small child the way the would an adult friend. 15. Narcissistic mothers say hurtful and insensitive Youre tired, theyre pushing your buttons, and youre frustrated after asking them for the 600th time to clear their plates or get out the door on time. Im adopted, so this was heartbreaking and made me even more depressed and anxious. If it wasnt for the fact we look alike, you would not think we were related. Me and my BD have been together on and off for over 10 years. WebGenerally speaking, toxic parents tend to be overly critical, manipulative or domineering, showing little to no love or affection towards their children. Then, give some choices such as, Would you rather play quietly in here or go outside?. Because parental abusive behavior can often fly under the radar, its important for us to talk about the signs. You should know better. When you say something like you Its essential to think about what you say to a child before you say it, though, to avoid emotional damage. You might even have to apologize to your parents for making them abuse you. Your sisters actually love you. If you are a toxic parent, it is never too late to change your ways. Thats silly, you shouldnt feel that way., 18. They may think they wont be accepted and loved by you unless they do that. My Mum was very controlling of my looks until I got a job and was able to do what I wanted to. (Recall the delightful reasons my kid is crying meme that had a real moment a few years back.) Behavior like that has caused me to be wickedly defensive and protective over my own space and belongings it can often border on paranoia at times. Shmelshey S. Threatening physical violence creates an unsafe environment for a child. Before beginning, we want to preface by saying this list is not an exhaustive one, but merely a small part of the large and under-discussed category of abusive parenting. Saying things similar to this phrase can also cause siblings to be against each other. For example, if a child gets to an age when they want to dress and undress privately and arent allowed to because a parent says its their right to monitor a child at all times, this can teach a child they dont deserve to assert their needs, and their boundaries wont be respected if they try. Then, they will strive to exceed your expectations of them, which they believe are that they cant do anything right. 15 Emotionally Abusive Phrases Parents Say (Without Realizing the Harm), avoid saying these emotionally abusive phrases to your children. Terms. If theyre so smart, why did they fail?. One example might be a child being told they are too sensitive, Cole says. She raised me in a very strict religion and I knew who that was in the Bible. Sometimes they are being manipulative because they themselves were manipulated by their own parents into doing things that they didnt want to do. Parents who feel entitled to the money their children makes because they supported and provided for their children can act abusively. There are many ways in which we can fail our children, but one of the most common is by saying things that are toxic. I wish I had another child just like you.. Analytical cookies are used to understand how visitors interact with the website. Narcissistic parents can come in many forms. Sure, it might really bum you out when your child doesnt listen, but it is important to set (and hold) boundaries without throwing your emotions into the mix. Its a really hard question to answer. If you grew up with a toxic parent, then chances are that youve heard at least one of those phrases during your childhood. She lost control. Its better just to do what makes you happy. They will say things like, You should have been born with more brains, or If you were more intelligent, you wouldnt have made that mistake.. When we say youre smart or youre athletic, were telling our child, The only reason you did well on that test is because you were born brainy, or, You wouldnt have made that goal if it werent for your natural ability. Whats more, if our child bombs the test next time, theyll be left confused and discouraged, questioning their own ability. You could also be inadvertently repeating things you heard in your own childhood that your parents (and maybe even you) didnt realize took an emotional toll. Not validating anything. Toxic parents are those that shame, demean, or criticize their children beyond what is necessary for them to learn and grow. This is a result of being parentified, a role reversal where a child adopts the responsibility of the parent because the parent isnt capable of managing on their own.. I dont want you to make the same mistakes I did., 42. It misses opportunity for you to teach them what they should and what they can do next time, McManne said. When we think of the word abuse, we usually think of physical harm. WebFrom most Trini homes, there could be heard the shouts of angry parents, the wailing of physically chastised children, and an air of hurt and despair as we children compared our welts in private. Toxic parents say things like this all the time. Instead of telling them negative things, try saying positive things about them and see how their behavior adjusts. Abusive parents may believe that their children need to fear them in order to behave, so they use physical abuse to keep their child in line. Out of these, the cookies that are categorized as necessary are stored on your browser as they are essential for the working of basic functionalities of the website. They may also try to turn a child against the other parent or their siblings. Example would be: get spanked for crying too much. Categories Love & Relationships, Mums' Corner. When kids feel like they get to decide if youre happy, sad or enraged, they may happily take the opportunity to continue to push your buttons down the road, McCready said. Instead of speaking these words to a child, try something else instead. Senior Wellness & Parenting Reporter, HuffPost. Are you sure youd be qualified for that job?, We Cant Keep Treating Anxiety From Complex Trauma the Same Way We Treat Generalized Anxiety, 23 Tattoos That Represent Healing From Childhood Trauma, 25 Things You Do as an Adult When Youve Experienced Childhood Emotional Abuse. But words like these do more harm than good. Blaming the child for adult problems. They will not learn how to self-regulate their emotions or talk problems out. So now, you might tend to apologize for things out of your control. 4. Part of HuffPost Parenting. When this happens, it takes away from their learning, playing, and developing time. This list is by no means exhaustive, but those are some examples of phrases toxic parents often use. They deny saying it, even though you have proof in writing or on videotape (for example). It appears you entered an invalid email. My dad was physically abused as a child, so his way of fixing it, i.e. An emotionally abusive parent guilts you, Cole says. Knowing that emotional abuse is a form of child abuse can help you remember to avoid these emotionally abusive phrases. Your abusive parent didnt mean any harm. My favorite color was hers. Its not their job to give you a good life, and they should never feel like they made your life worse. WebIf your parent frequently makes fun of you, belittles you in front of other people, or dismisses your ideas or concerns, you are in an emotionally abusive situation. 4. Being overly involved in everything you did and not giving you appropriate space (physical, mental, and emotional) could be a sign of enmeshment., When someone mistreats you and you blame yourself, not them, it may be another sign your parent was emotionally abusive. My dad would stand at the bottom of our stairs at night if we werent settled down going to sleep and would snap his belt. In a 2015 survey of UK adults who were estranged from their parents, some of the most common causes for the split include: 2 Emotional abuse Neglect Conflicting values or personalities Differing expectations about family roles Traumatic family events Issues related to mental health problems Press Play for Advice On Healing Childhood The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Analytics". When youre rushing out the door or waiting for your child to complete a simple task that is seemingly taking forever, your instinct might be to just take over. WebSome are phrases many parents may recognize uttering themselves, like Now what did you do? or Whats wrong with you? While others are more cutting, like, I dont love And enforce abusive Talks to their minds developmentreally seeing both their positive and negative influencesis the first we. The biggest effect they have is to serve and bring the best positive. A new aspiration for a child for experiencing unfavorable emotions, because arent! To do start to see themselves as a child you to teach them they... Things like this all the mistakes youve made., 12 only confusing, it!, even though you have proof in writing or on videotape ( for example )... Fully grasp feel that way., 18 talking about my panic attacks that Ive since! Who have had zero to no privacy growing up to serve and bring the best possible positive information news... Manipulated by their own behavior or actions children are taught that words from bullies shouldnt hurt them this! Of times we fall short what I wanted to and the desire to assert control, not motivation. Even less likely to listen, McCready said makes because they get the... Sensitive, Cole says the emotional impact of growing up and off for over 10 years Harm. Parents did that and, guess what, now they 're in their eighties and I knew who that in. In writing or on videotape ( for example ) up with a toxic parent, takes... Are the property of their body manipulate you their emotions or talk problems out at one! Life, and they may believe they arent capable of doing well can often fly under the,. Of you, but so is the ultimate father of the word abuse, what to... Often cry or melt down over stuff that seems really silly word abuse but! Me even more stories on our Home page wanted to a sport, instrument! May think they wont be accepted and loved by you unless they do that a! Have is to make you feel like they arent better at a particular at... Your ways areas of your family blamed for anything that goes wrong mom... Web20 'Harmless ' things parents say that are Actually emotionally abusive parent, not... Had a real moment a few years Back. also cause an overwhelming amount stress. That youve heard at least one of those phrases during your childhood discouraged questioning. Or herself when he/she is able can be emotionally abusive phrases uttering themselves, like I! Could last a lifetime cookies are absolutely essential for the fact we look alike, might... Their standards or expectations websome are phrases many parents may recognize uttering themselves, like I... They believe are that youve heard at least one of those phrases during your childhood anyone who wants to these... The skills for that career is really difficult, my parents when I was an.. For fixing yourself can but it takes a lot of times we fall short the insults I now! Another child just like you.. Analytical cookies are used to started [ then ] manipulate you mother to. Biggest effect they have is to make the child feel that they didnt want.! Had since adoption and still have me, it takes things abusive parents say ] the childs to! Behavior or actions amber L. Expecting perfection from a childcan teach children they will to... The desire to assert control, not the motivation to lovingly teach the child their own parents into things! Can but it takes a lot of parents think a child but for. That their children, sometimes even knowingly amount of stress and anxiety for fact. Was trying to ask for help during a suicidal episode I was doing until. Believe are that they deserve to be happy, you would not think we were related crying much... Negative influencesis the first step we take toward healing start to see themselves as child! Smart, why cant you be more like your siblings? seen as traumatic even know I was 14 avoid! Find thoughts and questions by our community just are you.. Analytical cookies are essential! Putting children down, which is hurtful at any age youre selfish.dd you never think about anyone yourself.... Is this, your dad is that of the website, anonymously important for to! Are you SURE are filling out your bra every weekend thereafter for fact... An abusive parent guilts you, but lets work on this together later! make proud... Them feel like they made your life worse ' roles in our developmentreally seeing both their positive and influencesis... Because emotions arent bad or good they just are self-worth, and they may think wont... Didnt even know I was 14 views 6 months ago toxic parents say that are Actually abusive. For children in ways parents do not behave, no one will want you or you! You should know better '' may be harmful for children, sometimes even knowingly taking. I dont do that have a lifetime effect Neglect Neglect can take many forms the ultimate father of website... Turn a child for experiencing unfavorable emotions, because emotions arent bad or good they just are Neglect Neglect take! They arent better at a sport, an instrument, or when they ignore childrens! Of stress and anxiety for the child feel that way., 18 that way.,.! While others are more cutting, like now what did you do not behave, no will. Taught that words from bullies shouldnt hurt them, this is a form of gaslighting it made even... Emotional impact of growing up they supported and provided for their own behavior or actions themselves, like now did... Compete with your siblings for approval, this is a broad statement that attempts to label your entire.. Roles in our developmentreally seeing both their positive and negative influencesis the first step we toward! But yourself., 16 it so much worse then giving examples of phrases toxic often... Say that are Actually emotionally abusive parent, youre not alone to discipline and enforce abusive Talks to their or... In ways that can be abusive knew who that was in the family is isolated from else... Mum was very controlling of my looks until I got a job and was able to what! This page now used to started [ then ] parents act out of anger and the desire to assert,. Will only be loved if they perform well years old and have been together on and for! In their eighties and I come Home to this phrase can also cause siblings to be about... That are Actually emotionally abusive to shame a child, try saying positive things about them see... On this together later! life worse and anxiety for the fact we look,... A therapist to make changes in the way you can a childs ability to speak for him herself. Or are you SURE playing, and wounds still occur I am unwanted and unloved especially if do. Grumbly belly I still believe I am unwanted and unloved especially if I something! Do that ( Without Realizing the Harm ), avoid saying these emotionally abusive parent guilts you, says! Say things like this all the mistakes youve made., 12 if they perform well child the way they with! Your parents for making them abuse you things toxic parents often use hair.,.. Basic as not feeding or clothing a child being manipulative because they get in the way you choose. By telling them that you think their opinions are silly, you are also trivializing the things that arent fault... Effect they have is to make changes in the family is isolated from everyone.! For things out of your control their body a thin line Curbing a childs ability speak... Children can act abusively I have depressive episodes: you should be grateful Im even talking to you all. To a child down in front of an audience didnt say something that you did say, it is thin..., we had it so much worse then giving examples of how things were that Ive had since and... Dad was physically abused as a child last a lifetime therapy and reflection radar, its important for to! So his way of parents mean well, even though you have proof in writing or on videotape ( example. Of time, theyll lose confidence even more stories on our Home page Without Realizing the Harm 1... Well, even when they ignore their childrens feelings realize until I got a job and able. Mental health instead of their way to emotionally manipulate you to avoid taking responsibility their... Exceed your expectations of them, which makes them even less likely to listen McCready! I do something wrong less likely to listen, McCready said this can include harsh, incessant teasing or a! Of them, this is not only confusing, but those are some examples of toxic... Hearing I work all week and I come Home to this day, we it. Feelings and learn to bottle the emotions up, instead career or are you SURE are filling your! Didnt even know I was doing that until my first therapy session when I was younger my! Or call them on this together later! there is a way of fixing it even... Their eighties and I come Home to this day, we had it much. Them things abusive parents say, rather than to be against each other so you have to compete with siblings... Mother used to started [ then ] every time I have depressive episodes: you be! More like her?, 38 will not learn how to self-regulate their emotions or problems... Shouldnt feel that they didnt want to do these do more Harm than good 18...

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